Honest Anime Trailers: BLEACH
by Insertnameheretwentytimes
Summary: Just love Screen Junkies too much so here's an honest anime trailer Rated H for honest Brutal Honesty Strong Sarcasm


**From the author, Tite Kubo**

**The greatest troll since George R. R. Martin**

**At least we won't have to worry about Kubo eating himself to death**

**Comes this series that has reached the top ten charts at every manga place and made girls read it only for the hot guys**

**And ruining it by shipping clearly bad couples and yaoi**

**OOOOOH THE YAOI**

**Anything but the yaoi! Don't made me look at that stuff, it's HORRIFYING!**

**This series made the most annoying generation of OCs by fans since Sonic the Hedgehog**

**And the most forced romances even though the author specifically said his manga is not a romance**

**With the name of what people drink to commit suicide or to get famous**

**BLEACH**

**Hey, this is easier compared to most mangas when for them it's Hakavdjnksjmc no djhcvhdjh no hvjxdhcki cjndsock baka**

**Meet Ichigo Kurosaki, your typical ghost-seeing attractive ****high schooler who constantly gets into fights over dead people's flowers**

**And he talks to the dead people while kids point at him and stare **

**He's like Jenifer Love Hewitt in Ghost Whisperer except without the boobs!**

**He meets Rukia Kuchiki, a Soul Reaper-Wait, that's not what you call them? Okay then...**

**She's a Shinigami, happy, you English dub-haters?**

** Rukia enters his room through a window, he kicks her in the head, blah, blah**

**She shows him crappy drawings while he is bound by invisible rope**

**Then a evil ghost demon thing comes and tries to kill Ichigo even though there are more people around there that can be a decent substitute but it decides to hunt down that one teenager**

**The Shinigami tries to defeat the Hollow, but is badly injured even though she has a Zanpakuto but the author decided to reveal it in 180 chapters**

**She offers to to Ichigo her powers by sticking her sword into his chest**

**When he gets the powers, he gets Cloud's Buster Sword **

**For some reason, he suddenly has great swordsmanship despite never actually using a sword in his entire life **

**He kills the Hollow, and all is well**

**Unfortunately, Rukia has committed a serious crime **

**No, it's not for stabbing a human, but for giving the human powers so she has to be crucified**

**Wow, even Ryuk or Grell didn't have to suffer that much punishment and they killed more people than her!**

**So, after a few episodes of character introductions and school life, Rukia runs away to be captured by her brother-in-law and a red pineapple**

**It is up for Ichigo ****to save Rukia**

**With the help of...**

**(Showing Uryu)**

**A nerd**

**(Showing Chad)**

**A tough guy**

**(Showing Ganju)**

**A not-so-tough guy**

**(Showing Orihime)**

**A fanservice girl**

**(Showing Kisuke) **

**A pervert and**

**(Showing Yoruichi)**

**A ninja cat woman**

**To defeat villains like...**

**(Showing Mayuri) **

**A nerd**

**(Showing Kenpachi)**

**A tough guy**

**(Showing Yumichika)**

**A not-so-tough guy**

**(Showing Rangiku)**

**A fanservice girl**

**(Showing Shunsui)**

**A pervert and **

**(Showing Soi Fon)**

**a ninja cat woman**

**Together they will...**

**Roan around the Soul Society for five episodes**

**Roan around when they get into the Seireitei **

**Walk into random guys that want to kill them**

**Get almost killed by the guys that want to kill them**

**So sit back and watch...**

**Fifteen minutes of walking**

**Flashbacks that take a whole episode**

**Swords clashing **

**Cutting**

**Blood**

**Talking more than actual fighting**

**After some more stuff, Ichigo comes across the man named Renji who kidnapped Rukia and after they have an intense battle, he begs him to save her even though he was the one who kidnapped her for Rukia's brother-in-law**

** After some more intense battles, Ichigo gets to save Rukia with his friends but it turns out a new villain has appeared**

**(Aizen crushing his glasses)**

**It's Japanese Superman**

**Along with a racist-looking stereotype of Chinese people and a blind black guy**

**They get raptured before everyone's eyes as they stuck their middle fingers at everyone**

**All is well after that and Ichigo becomes a pussy as more stuff happens and his other friend is kidnapped **

**And this extends farther and farther for a few years now so that Tite Kubo can continue to roll around in his swimming pool of cash**

**Starring...**

**Carrot Top (Ichigo)**

**Still better than Sakura (Rukia)**

**Yakuza Pineapple (Renji)**

**BEWBS (Orihime)**

**Shinpachi Shimura (Uryu)**

**Mexican D Grey Man (Chad)**

** A'MURICA (Ganju)**

**Vic Mignogna (Ikkaku)**

**James from Pokemon (Yumichika)**

**BEWBS (Kukaku)**

**Halle Berry's Catwoman**** (Yoruichi)**

**Chris Hemsworth (Kisuke)**

**Kenny the Shark (Kenpachi)**

**Ronald McDonald (Mayuri)**

**Sephiroth (Jushiro)**

**Old Spice (Shunsui)**

**Gandalf the Ripped (Yamamoto****)**

**Kallen from Code Geass (Soi Fon)**

**A doggie! (Komamura)**

**Every fangirl's favorite character (Byakuya)**

**Your mom (Unohana)**

**It's a trap! (Toshiro)**

**BEWBS (Rangiku)**

**Miley Cyrus (Wonderweiss)**

**Lady Gaga (Shinji)**

**MORE BEWBS (Nelliel)**

**Billy Ray Cyrus (Stark)**

**Lion-O (Grimmjow)**

**Japanese Satan (Ulquiorra)**

**Bill Nye the Science Guy (Szayel)**

**Crest White Strips (Nnoitra)**

**EVEN MORE BEWBS (Harribel)**

**WE'VE GOT BEWBS FOR DAYS!**

**Gin-toki Sakata (Gin)**

**Kanye West (Tosen)**

**Revenge of the Dragonball Z narrator (Aizen)**

**BLEACH**


End file.
